Lukasz trying to deal with life

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I never wished to finish this nonsense like now.

God take my life, give it to someone whose life has any point. Who loves and is loved.

Show me please your mercy. Dont punish me here and There.

Take care of Julcia and Henryk.

Please God, only you know how I suffer. How I am at border. How I have no power. Please, listen to me.

There is so many lifes worthy to save.

I beg you to not let me publish any other notes here.

Please finish it. I tried. You know this.

I am so sorry. I am so sorry.

Any moment of my life when I was alone before meeting Juleczka, when I thought I was happy, was not even one percent of happiness I had having Her arround.

One minute with her: lying on a bed, walk hand by hand, watching moovie, playing badminton,.chess, going together to the shop was more than any other moment of being happy before meeting her. Because after of course I didnt experience any moment of smile. And I will never do.

How marvelous time it was. How much I miss Her. What I would do to have Her for one more day arround me. No limits...

Unverbed pain...

I fighted many days to have energy to write something here.

I am not able to do anything.

All I am able to say is that I dreamt whole last night about Juleczka. We loved, She was beautiful as always.

.... my end is very close

All my last days I struggled like tiger just to survive till my birthday.

I am totally emotionally, physically, mentally dead. But I hoped. I repeated to myself: survive till 13th.

She didnt write. She didnt contact. She hates... Who she made from me in her eyes...

Now nothing to wait for. I desire to die.

One year ago I spent my birthday with the best girl in the world. Now crying whole day. Every day from few weeks without break.

God, please stop this nonsense life. Give power to my Father. Give strengh to Juleczka. Keep them both in health and mental force. Love them. Thank you for them.

I would like to say so much, at least write here.

But I am not able.

Not.able to work to pay to Julcia.

Not able to go to the shop.

Not able to do anything.

No power, no aim, no point.

7 months without breathe. Enough.

I love you my Everything. I am sorry.

Lukasz trying to deal with life

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01	02	03	04	05	06	07
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