20/01/23 05:19
One of this night when I cry all night long.
Of crazy, crazy missing. Mental unreal pain. Biggest love.
pn | wt | sr | cz | pt | so | nd |
26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 01 |
02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 |
09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |
16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 |
23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 |
30 | 31 | 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 |
One of this night when I cry all night long.
Of crazy, crazy missing. Mental unreal pain. Biggest love.
Juleczka, kochanie, do you live good.
Are you fine...
Attack of panic. In shop, at work, when alone. Everywhere.
Unstoppable tears. From nowhere. Dozens times daily.
Jesus Christ, if You exists, which I hope - when THIS happens, will You also leave me? At the moment of judgement, when I will ask for mercy and understanding. Will you also not come? Will you be absent? At the moment when I will only count on you, will you disappear?
Please, whisper to Almighty, dont leave me. Please Jesus. Only You know everything. How I surfer in silence.
Hold my hand. I cant stand this anymore.
Exist. Please
Give me still hope, give me some power.
Dont leave me.
God. If You exists. Please
I have milion thoughts in mind which I would like to say. But I am not able.
Not able to write. Not able to stand up.
Awful year, but only such left in my life.
One, only one happy was 2020, two months in 2019 and 3,5 in 2021.
I would give absolutely all to be even for one moment happy like those days...
You are, Juleczka in my mind near all time. Many times also in dreams. I cant think about anything else. Only You, my Sweetest Angel.
But you will never be conscionous about that.
Your wish was to not contact. You are all for me. So even knowing its kill me, I respect it to save You. And write here, to noone, over my power. Until the end.
Buan Anno 2023, Julunia...